Saturday, March 29, 2014

HUMOR HEATING UP

Here are my favorites. i pick the ones that cause me to LOL.

Seth Meyers

Pope Francis and President Obama met for the first time today and prayed together. Said Obama, "Lord please help me accept the things I cannot change, which is everything."

Jimmy Fallon

They're considering a new 10-cent fee on grocery bags here in New York. My Mom said, "Who's laughing at the 8000 bags under the sink NOW?"

I lol because my wife has the same number under the sink! Next we go to NYC perhaps we can sell them for a nickel a piece.

David Letterman

Let's talk about March Madness. It starts out with 68. Then it goes to 32. And then it drops to 16. You know what it's like? It's like President Obama's approval ratings.

Bye for Now,

Bill

I KNOW I HAVE BEEN QUIET LATELY

perhaps because of my cold and "fatigue virus" or perhaps I have run out of thoughts to blog about. Never!

I can tell u this. Though I grieve for the families of the missing flight, which is perhaps the most bizarre story in aviation history since Amelia Earhart disappeared, I felt it was very inappropriate for the loved ones to be protesting, throwing bottles of water, and generally acting out.

I understand their horror, but the people who conspired to do this are likely dead. The government officials and airline executives, inept as they might seem, did not kill their loved ones. Throw bottles of water in the water.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

ON A LIGHTER NOTE

There are some "late night" jokes that tickled my fancy or in more modern speak made me LOL The bigger question is why i am doing this at 4am.

In any event, we have David Letterman saying

"North Korean leader Kim Jong Un won reelection with 100% of the vote. They say when the absentee ballots are counted the percentage could go even higher."

I say goodbye Dave, Dennis is coming to get you soon you silly rabbit!

Seth Meyers had a funny with " Today is the first day of spring. And just in time because yesterday was the 400th day of winter."

After moving to Florida in 1973 this winter vindicated me. My wife still hates it here but i keep telling her "you will get used to it!"

And finally, Conan O'Brien said, " A barber shop in Colorado is refusing to serve anyone who smells like marijuana. Today they went out of business."

Thanks for keeping us laughing guys. Soon a female will replace you all. My money is on Hillary!

Bye for now,
bill

Monday, March 24, 2014

LIFE IS TRULY STRANGER THAN FICTION

So today we get the official word that we fundamentally knew more than 2 weeks ago. The flight is lost at sea for reasons yet unknown.

The families are lost at sea as well and have been put through the ringer for all this time. The longer it lasted the more we fantasized about a landing with the people still alive. Today our hopes and prayers were dampened by reality.

Human error seems to be riddled through this saga from start to finish. In our post 9/11 world I would expect so much more. Yet it is what it is. If it were a movie it would lack credibility, which is why truth is ....

Something or someone killed 239 people and left their families in pain. God bless those lost and their sad loved ones left behind.

Every day life is a crap shoot.

Let us acknowledge and affirm that we are lucky and blessed to be here.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Sunday, March 16, 2014

IT IS VERY SAD

that the plane is still missing and grieving families have no clue what happened to their loved ones.Time will tell the true story—hopefully.

Meanwhile, do you wonder what the news channels would be talking about if this tragedy never happened? I mean there is coverage, overkill, and extreme coverage—especially when from one expert to another there is disagreement and added confusion.

"We are clueless" would be an appropriate statement. In the old days news was absent. Today, it is too present.

Bye for now,

bill

WATCH OUT FOR THIS BUG

Been sick for a week now. It's only a cold BUT it has a rhythm all its own.

First usual cold symptoms, then morphs into bronchitis, then morphs into zombie fatigue, then the cold comes back and the stages repeat themselves.

Steer clear of this particular virus. As for me i am going back to bed!

Bye for Now,

bill

Sunday, March 9, 2014

JOKE OF THE WEEK

THREE TIED FOR FIRST PLACE:

JIMMY FALLON— A new survey found that the average American child watches 24 hours of TV every week. In fact, experts say it's important for parents to lay down the law and tell their kids to get outside and look at their phones.  (kinda sad but true!)

CRAIG FERGUSON—Meteorologists say 90% of the Great Lakes are frozen over. People from Chicago are being urged to stay off the frozen lakes, but if you want to see someone from Chicago on thin ice, just go to the White House.  (kinda sad but true)

CONAN O'BRIAN— The White House announced a change to Obamacare. They keep making adjustments.They say people can now keep their insurance plans for two more years. When asked what would happen after two years, Obama said, "After two years, I don't give a damn." (kinda sad but true)

Bye for Now,

bill

Saturday, March 8, 2014

APPROACH NEXT WEEK

expecting a miracle and you might just find one coming your way.

Think about all the miracles that have happened in your blessed life and feel grateful. Being alive is a gift of grand proportion. Enjoy every moment.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Sunday, March 2, 2014

APPARENTLY

Miami Dolphin non legend Ritchie Incognito bullies more than teammates.

He was accused of beating his $300,00 Ferrari FF with a baseball bat. Ritchie is now resting comfortably in a rehab center in Arizona where the incident took place.

His car, on the other hand is hurt and wounded and has moved to an unknown location. Rumors have it that the car moved back to Italy!

Bye for Now,

Bill

THE JOKE OF THE WEEK GOES TO

Conan O'Brien:

"A former Target employee is accusing the store of hiring only attractive people as managers. Apparently he's talking about a Target store I have never been to."

Me neither!

Bye for Now,

Bill