Tuesday, September 24, 2013

I REALLY GAVE IT MY BEST SHOT

but they didn't. I am NOT a TV guy but decided to watch THE GOLDBERGS. When I proposed this to my wife she immediately took my temperature, but happily sat next to me. We laughed at its absurdity.

I can't find the words strong enough to define or denigrate it. It made no sense. It wasn't funny. It wasn't Jewish schtick—it was schlock (aka crapola).

How do they spend all those dollars to put out a show that made no sense?

I'll try TV again in a few years. Meanwhile I'm betting they won't make episode 4. Life is just too short to watch THE GOLDBERGS! I don't think there will be reruns—just the runs.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Monday, September 23, 2013

THERE WAS A MAGICIAN AT MY GYM SATURDAY

As I often do I left my towel in the sauna before heading for the steam room. I am not a sauna fan, but love the toasty towel it can produce. When I returned 15 minutes later the magician had made my towel disappear. Now I had a soaking wet problem. I applied and followed my own advice.

Penzer's Theory of Relativity—could have been much worse loss and I can spare a towel to a needy "magician."
Penzer's Theory of Adaptation—we humans are amazingly adaptable so paper towels and my tee shirt did the job reasonably well.
Penzer's Theory of Paranoia— it is not paranoid to be paranoid these days! Keep your towel in your locker.

If you use these three ideas life will get much easier. If you see someone with a lite brown towel tell him or her I send my love. That is my next Theory—love thy neighbor even when s/he steals your stuff. Better than getting shot by an assault rifle!

Bye for Now,

bill

Sunday, September 22, 2013

OOPS IT HAPPENED AGAIN!

Just days after my rant against assault rifles, the NRA, poles, and the deranged people who fire them, it happened again in Chicago. The perp did his target practice at a pick-up basketball game. Must have seen an uncalled foul so he chose to commit an uncalled for foul act. WTF?

Thirteen were injured including a 3-year-old boy. Most fortunately no one was killed. And the perp did not do the ceremonial suicide, but simply fled the scene.

Do we as a nation not have the courage to take action to tighten up the holes in the system, without violating our right to bear arms? I understand there is a black market that will always be there, but can't we make it a little more difficult for the criminally insane to purchase lethal weapons legally?

Shoot me if I'm wrong, but like this on fbook if you agree.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Saturday, September 21, 2013

POPE POOPED OUT

about abortion. I didn't mean it... I was misquoted...I had a brain fart! is what it seemed as if he was saying the day after he was quoted all over the world.

Then he went on to say, "Every baby who is not born, but is uniquely condemned to be aborted, has the face of Jesus Christ."

Will the real Pope Francis please stand up and identify himself! And will you please help us to understand your understanding of genomics. There is only one face of Christ, best as I know. To suggest otherwise denigrates him and you.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Friday, September 20, 2013

POPE FRANCIS IS MY KIND OF GUY

This is truly a man of the cloth—the loin cloth!

He doesn't want to get caught up in "petty issues" such as contraception, abortion, pre-marital sex, and the like. He wants priests to be pastors for their community, being helpful, supportive, and understanding. He is preaching and teaching a philosophy that even a Jewish liberal such as myself can understand, support, and relate. He is giving the church a breath of fresh air, as well as an updated perspective that is realistic and reasonable.

He has my vote and hope he still has that of the cardinals who elected him.

Bye for Now,

bill

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

SURELY, I CAN'T BE THE ONLY ONE

terribly tired of mourning for strangers massacred in terrible scenes of gun violence. Are we really going to let the NRA control our destinies? I mean, even those of us who are not gun people are not screaming to ban guns. But we are saying let's get assault weapons out of the hands of the mentally deranged. Does anyone, except the deranged, have a problem with that?

The doctor overseeing the victims in the Navy Yard said it best:

There's something evil in our society that we as Americans have to work to try to eradicate. There's something wrong here when we have these wall-to-wall shootings. I'd like you to put my trauma center out of business."
—Janis Orlowski, M.D.

I would like to add:

There is something wrong when officials elected to represent the good of the people are busy representing the good of their party and/or the good of those who support their run for office. It is time that the "party" be over and that we elect people to represent us who convince us they will do just that.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

NOT A CRAPPY JOKE! IT TICKLED MY FUNNY BONE


It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' center.
After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance.
"Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket; a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see.
"It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations" said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting
"Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch"
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.
They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact!
"SHIT!" said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens' Center, and Claude was never invited there again.
 
LOL is healthy.
 
Bye for Now,
 
bill

Saturday, September 14, 2013

I KNOW I PROMISED

no more Weiner/Spitzer jokes BUT this one seemed like an apt ending to a sad and silly time.

Conan O'Brian:

"I am a little bummed out because it looks like the Anthony Weiner madness is finally over. It was so good for talk show hosts, one of the best things that ever happened. As he drove away from reporters, he gave them the finger. So at least he went out with dignity.  That's the important thing."

Me speaking—I feel sad for his wife. My guess is that she is a good woman. He, on the other hand, needs to run for dog catcher, and go after himself. Ruff ruff!

Bye for Now,

Bill


Thursday, September 12, 2013

WE TAKE SO MUCH FOR GRANTED

Today the # 1.3 billion jumped at me—not in a check mind you.

Eighteen percent of the world's population—1.3 billion people—have no electricity ever. That number shocked me.

And, 1.3 billion tons of food are wasted every year throughout the world, if you can imagine that.

I will bet a nickel that those who lack electricity also lack food. The inequities of the world are hard to fathom, and we need to reflect on what we have, even if we don't have it all.

There is an old Yiddish proverb that says, "If everyone put  their 'dirty clothes' out on the line everyone would take back their own load.  How true is that?

Bye for Now,

Bill

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

ALL THESE YEARS LATER

tomorrow will still be a very sad day. No matter where you were on 9/11 you will never forget the details, disbelief, horror, and the pain.

Tragedy is etched in our brains like a permanent tattoo. May we mourn, learn and heal, and may our enemies become neutered, if not realize we are not theirs!

We are, I believe, a peace-loving nation who looks to do good, but never shirks from responding to those who don't.

God bless America and all freedom-loving nations of the world.

Bye for Now,

bill

Monday, September 9, 2013

MAKE IT YOUR BUSINESS

to reach out and do something kind for someone else this week. It fills your "pride bank" and can mean so much to someone struggling.

Little kindnesses can make a very Large difference.

Bye for Now,

Bill

Thursday, September 5, 2013

A HEALTHY

 NEW YEAR to all.

Good wishes are nondenominational.

Bye for Now,

bill

Sunday, September 1, 2013

I'M NO MOVIE CRITIC BUT

I really liked The Butler even though it was a fictionalized and Hollywoodized version. It held my attention the entire time and told the story of desegregation in a  most interesting way. Perhaps, part of my interest and fascination is that I lived through that era of protest and marched on Washington and down 5th Avenue. I wasn't really a rebel, but I/We did have a cause.

Then again my movie reviews and recommendations may be lame as I am not a movie goer. I loved Jobs and thought Ashton did fantastically, but the critics thought otherwise. I am now reading Walter Isaacson's book  Steve Jobs, which I am greatly enjoying. I also like my books so maybe I am neither a movie or book critic.

Then again Je ne care pas!!

Bye for Now,

bill