Friday, October 29, 2010


Do one thing different today no matter how small. Put your left shoe on first or your right whichever is the opposite of what you usually do. Take a right turn when you usually take a left.Drink your coffee before your juice. Shave the opposite side of your face first from what you normally do.Put your eye make-up on differently from your usual way.

It loosens our creature of habit compulsions when we make some simple changes, which might just pave the way for more complicated ones.

Bye For Now,


Thursday, October 28, 2010


Pick something today and expect positive results. Expect whatever it is to go smoothly and comfortably. It doesn't have to be a biggy in the scheme of things. It could be as simple as a ride to the store or a phone call to a friend.

Just have positive expectations and see what happens and, if you like, let me know.

Bye For Now,


Wednesday, October 27, 2010


Believe me when I say I wish only happy dreams for you always.

I couldn't help but react to the Miami Heat's loss last night. Yes, I understand it is only the start of a new season and a new team and they need to get their bearings. BUT. After all the hype and all the practice and all the dream team talk you would have thunk they could have done just a little better than a nightmare loss on opening night.

So what does that tell us mortals who don't get paid multi-millions? Imperfection is the norm. We are, despite our pimples, OK. Nothing is for sure. Enjoy your time, best as you can. Feel proud of you and don't ever let the heat fall on you. Be your best friend. Hopefully Bosh, Wade and James will become that as well.If not, who really cares?

Bye for Now,


Tuesday, October 26, 2010


Flew home tonight from NYC. Turbulence terrible through a continuous series of lightening storms.

We chose to believe we would be fine, but for some rocking and rolling going on. Got in later than expected, but the important thing is we got in.

Practicing realistic optimistic positivism helps us get through the bumpy spots in our lives, both above the ground and on it.

Bye For Now,


Monday, October 25, 2010


There is much research to support the view that what we expect often happens. Not in the sense of expecting to win the lotto,but in the sense of expecting positive outcomes that are within our control or influence.

Go into surgery, a test, a challenging job assignment, etc. with positive expectations and research shows over and over that the results will likely be positive and much more so than those who go in with negative expectations.

So try to seek out optimism, hopefulness and positive expectations in all areas of your life and you will likely achieve more positive results, be in a better, less agitated mood and enjoy a certain degree of happiness and more importantly peace of mind.

Bye For Now,


Thursday, October 21, 2010


An often overlooked strategy for coping in today's complex and frustrating world is to wake up and say, "I'm going to have a good day today." The likelihood is that you will.Try it and see for yourself.

Bye For Now,

Wednesday, October 20, 2010


Saw a bumper sticker over the weekend that said:


I encourage us all to follow that simple guideline.

Bye For Now,


Tuesday, October 19, 2010


On Friday I applauded the miners and their international rescue team. Today I scratch my head just a bit. They went from miner to major too quickly if you ask me. They went from being stuck under the rocks to rock stars too quickly as well. And what about their massive team without whose help they would not be on level ground today?

Obviously all types of companies from Disney to sunglasses to a variety in between want to capture the allure of their "BRAND". But these are simple people who weren't even allowed to catch their breathes and breath in real air before they were besieged with a swarm of greedy people trying to use and buy them.

Apparently they knew this was coming as they signed a pact to stand together as they had done down below. I am not upset with them as much as for them. They needed to rejoin their families, heal from their trauma and re balance themselves on level and solid ground. Instead the world threw them into even more turmoil and confusion. It was and will be as if the earth beneath their feed will crash down upon them once again. They are ill prepared for this new found fame and it would have been kinder if they gave them a ticker tape parade in their home town before they were sent into stardom.

On the other side of the story in today's fast paced world of information their rescue will be old news very soon. I hope all the vultures that came running down lose their ass!

Bye For Now,


Monday, October 18, 2010


If the creator had a purpose in equipping us with a neck,he surely meant for us to stick it out.
Arthur Koestler

Inventing is a combination of brains and materials. The more brains you use, the less material you need.
Charles Kettering

Decide what you want and decide what you are willing to exchange for it. Establish your priorities and go to work.
H.L. Hunt

I think quotes are like projective tests of personality. We read into them what fits us. To me these all related to my writing project which is coming along well. The working title is "How To Cope Better When Someone You Love Has Cancer."

In that regard please do me a big favor. Tomorrow, 10/19 between 8 and 8:10 PM please say prayers for two twin boys, Jake and Chase, who are doing a bone marrow transplant this week to save Jake from Leukemia. They need all the help we and the good lord can provide. Thanks for taking your time to do that.

Bye For Now,


Friday, October 15, 2010


Bravo to the international teamwork that saved the miners in Chile. Bravo to the men themselves.

A great study of confidence,courage,optimism,hopefulness,adaptation and survival.

We can all take some plays to apply to our lives from their playbook.

The movie of this inspirational story should be in theaters very soon.

Bye For Now,


Thursday, October 14, 2010


The other day they reported that scientists have discovered 30 new gene variations of obesity and fat. Duh! They didn't have to spend all that money researching 250,000 people. All they had to do was study me. All my life my fat genes made my jeans too tight. Either that or they shrink in the closet overnight, especially if one is a "shrink".

I have always been convinced that my genes came with fat cells attached. Others eat food and gain no weight that I only have to smell to gain the pounds they should have.

"The study also found that people who inherit many of the BMI-increasing DNA variants from their parents weigh more than those who inherit few of the variants". Duh again. That is like saying people who eat mostly fast food are more obese than those who eat salads without dressing!

I eat mostly the latter. So what is my problem. Duh, I guess the scientists would say it was my genes. Never thought of that.

Bye For Now,


Wednesday, October 13, 2010


Friday's blog reminded us all to enjoy our lives and take some time off from time to time given that we just don't know what's coming around the corner. Later that same day my colleague's father died unexpectedly. To me that was a sad irony that validated my words.He was just about my age.

He was also a good,hardworking and loving family man. The picture portrayed by the Priest and his son,daughter and coworker was of a genuinely kind and caring person. That is a very nice way to exit our world. BUT why oh why do the good die so young?

May he rest in the peace he has surely earned. Though small in stature he was very tall in character. May his family find comfort in the trail of goodness he has left behind and all of their rich and valuable memories.

May we all live our lives as this man did. At the end of the road what's in your "pride bank" counts the most. Like Rosario, strive to be an emotional billionaire. He earned his way directly into Heaven the hard way.By being kind and loving every single day.

Bye For Now,


Tuesday, October 12, 2010


Yesterday's blog was a bit of a rant. Every so often that is good for the soul and the mind. Feeling cleansed, I am back on track.

Friday I met an interesting man. He and his friend have developed an amazing website for recovering addicts called It offers much in the way of information, support and fellowship. It makes support a let your fingers do the walking experience.It is not intended to replace meetings, but as a supplement to them.

There are hundreds of thousands of members all over the world who have joined for free.Just think about this potential, especially in places where meetings are few and geographically far between. Imagine the power of world wide web support when that compulsive itch hits someone in recovery.

We all know there is much that is not right with the internet. But these guys have demonstrated that from an i seed can spring a giant beanstalk that gives so much to so many in need. In my book they get the Stop Glop award of the year. Check it out and let others know that in Ft.Lauderdale,some people get it right! As for those who don't let's hope they move away real soon.

Bye For Now,


Monday, October 11, 2010


I really try to practice my philosophy of realistic optimism. As the millions who follow this blog know, I try to encourage a positive point of view.

But every once in a while I need to SCREAM-- OMG!

We have a person running for the top state office whose history leaves much to be desired. We watch as school board members are serially outed in scandals where they accepted low ball bribes for high ball favors.

Now we have a 67 year old married Federal Judge who paid to have sex with a stripper and bought her drugs as well.Adds a whole new meaning to "Here comes the judge!"

Then we have the idiots who picket military funerals with really ugly signs because they believe Gd kills soldiers because America accepts homosexuals and abortion.

Free speech allows many things including me to blog. There are,however, limits. I hope the Supreme Court finds them to keep these warped folks from tormenting sad folks whose children gave their lives for our country.

As for politicians, sell your souls if you must, but get what they are worth. Ten thousand or so in today's world is not enough to put your reputation and your future on the line.

I like the motto-- Do No Harm! Let us practice that.

Bye For Now,


Friday, October 8, 2010

happiness NOW

In life there is a tendency to delay gratification and happiness. I often think of the frequently heard story of the poor guy who worked and worked and saved and saved for retirement. Six or less months into it he drops dead. Or his wife does. Done. It is kinda like a sporting event. When the clock ticks down and the final bell rings the game is over. We don't like to think about that but it is undeniably true.

I believe in intermittent enjoyment of life as we progress through the life cycle.Happiness, pleasure and fun doesn't have to be earned. It is part of our birthright. I have never been part of the "all work and no play" team even though I have worked very hard in my life. I much prefer, "work hard, play hard."

Keep in mind that play, fun and happiness can be as simple as a walk in the park, a day at the beach or watching a movie on TV. Or it can be as extravagant as an enjoyable vacation. Every once in a while or more frequently if you can, deal yourself a "get out of jail free" card and escape. You will be glad you did.

Life is short, death is long and we are all heading there sooner or later. Choose happy and fun whenever you can. Cause you just never know what's coming around the corner!!

Bye For Now,


Thursday, October 7, 2010


The research mentioned yesterday polled more than 450,000 people. Asked them how they felt the day before and why.

Turns out that it wasn't low income that made people sadder. It was the byproducts of that in terms of stress, health problems and care, relationship conflicts and other associated issues.

In addition, as we would expect, self-esteem was influenced by the amount earned.The more people earn above 75k the more people believe that their life is working for them.Of interest is that more money doesn't seem to add to the happiness equation, but does add to feelings of enjoying a better life.

The authors explain this as people having enough expendable cash to enjoy their lives by doing fun things. All of this makes sense, BUT....

What if you have lots of money for fun, but a less than positive partnerly relationship compared to the opposite? Most would choose the better relationship and the less money model. What if you had lots of money. but lots of health related issues? Ditto.What if........? well you get my drift.

There is an old saying that goes, "Rich or poor it's good to have money." I would say, "It's nice to have wealth if you have your health, love and the ability to enjoy your life. Otherwise, better to have the other three.

Bye For Now,


Wednesday, October 6, 2010


Yesterday's quotes seemed to be wise words regarding finding happiness.

In many ways they fly in the face of recent research by a Nobel winning economist/ psychologist.The good doctors found that the cost of happiness is $75,000 a year. This flies in the face of the old saying that, "Money can't buy you happiness."

In fact, my experience suggests that the old saying is right on. I have met many people in my career who are financially happy, but personally miserable.With money comes burdens,responsibilities and unrealistic expectations. Wealthy people often sing the Rolling Stones, "Can't Get No Satisfaction."

Some of the happiest people I have ever met was in East and West Africa where they have little materially, but much culturally and communally. They have many smiles and little stress. They help each other in a "It takes a village" way.

The same is true here. There are many hard working people I have met who are part of communities that get together frequently and have pure, unadulterated FUN. Laughs are free as are dancing, socializing,listening to music, a Sunday picnic,etc. Keeping it simple can keep it happy and fulfilling.

More tomorrow on this research, Meanwhile,as the song says, "Don't Worry, Be Happy," no matter your income. After all, what else can we really do?

I once read a book called, "Happiness Is A Choice." Choose it, you'll like it!

Bye For Now,


Tuesday, October 5, 2010


Happiness depends upon ourselves.

To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness.
Bertrand Russell

The foolish man seeks happiness in the distance. The wise grows it under his feet.
James Oppenheim

Now and then it's good to pause in our pursuit of happiness and just be happy.
Guillaume Apollinaire

Bye For Now,


Monday, October 4, 2010


D Difficult, but doable
I Id vs super ego
S Self
C Control
I I Count
P Pride Bank
L Lazy Loses
I I Set Goals
N Nothing Can Stop Me
E Each Day I Am
D Determined

This posted on 9/22 without the first letter in each line. Hopefully this makes more sense.

Bye For Now,


Friday, October 1, 2010


At the end of the road upon which we struggle with self-discipline there seems to be an undeniable fact. Namely, that our healthy,goal oriented,take charge adult self is undermined by the little children that run around inside of us.No one, best as I observe, is completely free of his or her little boy or girls influence in some or many ways.

There are both healthy and less than healthy offshoots of that. Our child parts contribute significantly to our happy, creative, magical,spontaneous,adventurous and loving selves.

They also contribute to our impulsive,entitled,demanding, spoiled,need it now,unrealistic,angry,less than confident, insecure and self-destructive selves. In addition, they are the storage center for any and all trauma that occurred while we grew up.Those wounds become infected over time and promote impulse over self-control.

In reality, all addictions are based in and scripted by our child parts. This explains why they make so little sense to us and seem so irrational, self-destructive and ridiculous. This is why people of all ages need to seek sources of healing in order to contain the wild child within and be freed to operate from their more disciplined adult parts.

Picture a tug-a-war between your inner parts. May your adult be strong enough to always win in your efforts to achieve self-discipline. As the sign in my office says, "NEVER NEVER NEVER GIVE UP!

Bye for Now,