Wednesday, September 30, 2009

READING AS THERAPY

I am allowing myself more time to read novels than I have in the past. I believe it is great therapy to leave your life for a while and enter into a fictional world,making new friends and learning about the challenges of their lives.

One of my all time favorite writers is Pat Conroy--the Prince of a writer who wrote Prince of Tides, The Great Santini, Beach Music and recently, South of Broad. Whenever I read a Conroy book I realize what a wide divide exists between a great writer and one like me. Don't get me wrong, I like the way I write,but compared to him and others in his league I am playing Minor League ball and they are in the Majors.

He makes trhe words sound like a finely tuned chorus, harmonizing together in such a magical and powerful way that you are lifted off your chair and moved into a spellbinding  trance of disbelief that anyone could sound so smooth and rhythmic by using the printed word. Here is a randomly chosen sampling from the first page of South of Broad:

                      I carry the delicate porcelain beauty of Charlston like the hinged shell of some soft-tissued
                      mollusk. My soul is peninsula-shaped and sun-hardened and river swollen. The high tides of
                      the city flood my consciousness each day,subject to the whims and harmonies of full moons
                      rising out of the Atlantic. I grow calm when I see the ranks of palmetto trees pulling guard duty
                      on the banks of Colonial  Lake or hear the bells of St. Michael's calling cadence in the cicada-
                      filled trees along Meeting Street, Deep in my bones I knew early that I was one of those
                      incorrigible creatures known as Charlestonians.

See what I mean--definitely Major League. Me, a clutch singles hitter in the minors! But, hey we need those base hits from time to time.


Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.wiulliampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

SILLY IT AIN'T! THERAPY IT IS!

Yesterday I spoke about the many forms of therapy that life offers us. When I wrote the article,"Taking Better Care of You: The Secret Doors" (available on the website,menu choice writings), I suggested that people think of what they enjoyed when they were younger and  if possible,start doing it again,

In thinking about that I remembered how much I enjoyed playing basketball as a kid in the schoolyard at PS 64 in the Bronx. I wasn't all that good at it, but I really enjoyed it. So after that article I bought myself a basketball and after walking in the park, if time permits, I spend 10-15 minutes doing basketball "therapy".

Not only is it healthy exxercise and not only does it make me feel younger and not only does it remind me of happier and simpler times (where the only terrorists we knew of were teachers!),but darn if I'm not shooting more accurately now than I did at PS 64. That's what I call great therapy!


Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Monday, September 28, 2009

THE MANY FORMS OF THERAPY

I have always said that therapy comes in many different forms. Sitting in a "shrink's" office is only one kind.

To me therapy speaks not only to change and growth, but also to comfort and peace of mind. Think of all the things that offer that--many for free. Include a walk in the park or a bench on the beach, pleasant, relaxing music, a meaningful book, film or play.Also include the kinds of activities offerred by our Tranquility Center Director, Mimi---meditation, guided imagery, biofeedback,heart math...... Your first visit there is complimentary.

Think of those things that give you pleasure and a lift and be sure to add them to your list of weekly,if not daily activities. Take advantage of all the"therapy" life offers. For sure we can all benefit from whatever feeds our comfort and peace of mind.

 Give yourself permission and enjoy!


Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Friday, September 25, 2009

THE DALAI LAMA ON WAR

Yesterday's blog spoke to the wars raging in the Middle East like an out of control forest fire.

The Dalai Lama says,

                               History shows us that violence only engenders more violence
                               and rarely solves problems. On the other hand, it certainly creates
                               unfathomable suffering. It is also apparent that even when war seems
                               wise and logical as a means to end a conflict,we can never know for
                               sure whether by putting out a fire we are in fact lighting a furnace.

Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

see 3/17 post to know our goals

                                 

Thursday, September 24, 2009

SHALL WE OVERCOME SOMEDAY?

I recently received a well writtten email from a young woman about the wars we have been engaged in since 9/11. She was particularly upset about our troops being killed and mamed and even those who are so far away from home and their families. She suggested we become more involved

It made me think of the Viet Nam days where those of us who were opposed to that and any war, protested. We held rallies, listened to speeches,sang protest songs and marched locally and on Washington. I was part of that movement and marched in New York and Washington in the late 60's.

I couldn't help but wonder why that spirit of protest has disappeared? Where are the marchers and the songs? Why wasn't there more protest as it became clear that the war on Iraq and weapons of mass destruction was a result of a misguided mission?

I don't know the answer ,but something has changed in our society Perhaps the danger of technology is not only the impersonal, but also the inactivity. The computer and its virtual world is passive. It desensitizes us to war in the same way video games desensitize our young to violence. Our voice--protest or otherwise--has been reduced to 140 characters! We live too much of our life in a sitting position. In the 60's we moved about the planet regularly. Life required action. Today, life requires typing. We move our fingers more than our butts!

I hope we shall overcome, someday,but I'm just not sure anymore and that my friends is a bit of a bummer. Let's get off our butts and do something,even if it is to send a carepackage to a soldier in the Middle East. I am going to find out how to do that and let you know in a future blog.

No, we can't stop the wars,but we can do something positive which will help someone else and ourselves at the same time. That is the nature of human service. That requires action!

As I said in last Monday's blog the formula for success in life is:

                                   SHOW UP
                                   TAKE ACTION
                                   TRY YOUR VERY BEST

PEACE AND GD BLESS!


Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

YOU CAN'T ALWAYS JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS READER

Several people told me about the book, "The Secret" in a way that turned me off. They gave me examples that seemed silly.

The other day someone described it in a way that was similar to what psychologists call self-fulfilling prophecy. That means that our expectations can shape what actually happens under certain situations. For example, positively expecting to win the lottery will not, in my opinion, influence your winning it. The lotto is a random proccess, immune to human thinking and expectations.

However, medical outcomes have been found to be tied directly to our expectations. Anticiapte much pain, scaring and a long reciovery and the odds are that will happen. Expect some, but minimal pain, little scaring and rapid healing and the odds are that will happen. Similarly, expect to do well on a test or in your golf game or whatever performance issue and you will increase the probablility of your doing well. Expect negative outcomes and you increase the odds of them happening. This is precisely why people have been preaching positive thinking ever since Dr. Norman Vincent Peale wrote the book long ago.

Observe yourself in various settings and listen to your inner voice. Is it positive or negative? If the latter try moving to to a more positive view. If you can't get there, try to get to neutral. That is, "I don't know what will happen,but I am hopeful...".  Eventually, with effort, we can move our minds to more positive expectations.

As for me, I am going to read "The Secret".  I anticipate that much of it will be worth my time and helpful. I will let you know.

Bye For Now,


Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/


954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

SOMETIMES IMPERSONAL WORKS BETTER

A few weeks ago I wrote about the impersonalized world with some degree of lament,although acknowledging the efficiency of many techno developments.

I received a taste of that on Friday when I called my friendly banker to order more business checks. She asked for my verbal password, I gave it to her and she said, "That is not the one I have on file." I said, "I have had this problem before and they promise to change my business password to the same as my personal one,but apparently they never did." I started guessing randomly at what it might be and failed each time. Without a password you just don't exist! It felt as if I was trying to steal my own identity. I think the woman thought I was too.

 I do appreciate they are protecting me, but as you have no doubt experienced, it can be darn frustrating. She then began asking me about recent transactions, but I don't know about you, but I am happy I remember my name, telephone and social numbers, let alone memorizing the last check I wrote by  number, amount and payee. I gave up the mission.

The next day, I went on line to see if my order could be accomplished. My password worked and the transaction was sucessfully completed in less than 60 seconds.

Sometimes impersonal is a beautiful thing! Sometimes it's not.

Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Monday, September 21, 2009

ANGER MANAGEMENT:PART III

Last week, well known people gave us a lesson in anger management. Think Mr. West  (also a lesson in not drinikng alcohol out of a bottle in public...and one in the danger of alcohol  increasing our already existing assholic tendencies). Perhaps I will write an article called, "The Assholic Alcoholic." Then again perhaps all alcoholics are by definition.

Also think Serena who hit a hard, low backhand shot right at the umpire and double faulted. Her role model influence sadly faded to rap star levels.

Then go to the "BIG LIE" congressman from the south who thought he was making a point and instead made a fool of himself and his state.

What were these people thinking?  Truth be known they weren't. Anger is a force that takes us from rational to primitive in a firey,self-destructive crash and burn moment. I encourage you to learn from these and other examples and curb your temper before it throws you to the curb.

By the way I an planning to run an anger management for celebrities workshop, so if you know any, have them call "my people" so their participation can be arranged.


Bye For Now,

Bill

http://www.williampenzerphd.com/


954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

go to 3/17 blog to know our goals

Friday, September 18, 2009

HAPPY NEW YEAR

Tonight begins the holiest period in the Jewish Religion that celebrates the New Year. Commemorates is probably a better term as it is not a celebration akin to New Years eve. In fact, Yom Kippur-the day of atonement-is a fast of 24 hours and for those who are religious and even some that typically are not, an all day temple service. People are supposed to go to water to cast away their sins of the previous year. Fortunately for me I have nothing to cast away.

What is interesting is the similarities between religions. All deal with good and evil issues and ways to be forgiven for the bad and encouraged toward the light of the good. From early on--Adam and Eve time-- until right this moment the battle for people to behave positively has raged on unabated. This is why the Dalai Lama in yesterday's blog encouraged us to distinquish ourselves from animals.

My simple minded formula on this subject is that we all have within us a "pride bank" and a "shame and blame account." The goal of healthy, happy, comfortable living is to fill the former and prevent entries into the latter. Not complicated,but not always easy,but doable.

I wish everyone, whatever your religious affiliation, health, peace of mind and a year filled with pride bank deposits every day.

Bye For Now,

Bill


www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Thursday, September 17, 2009

EMOTIONAL FOOD FOR THOUGHT

Continuing the theme of this week's blogs the Dalai Lama said


Common sense shows that human life is short-lived
and that it is best to make of our brief soujourn
on this earth something that is useful to oneself and others.

Let's use our human intelligence wisely. Otherwise,how are we
superior to animals.

Satisfaction is characterized by inner peace.It arises from
generosity,honesty and what I call ethical conduct,that is,
a way of behaving that respects the right of others to
happiness.

By For Now,


Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

SHOWING UP

On Monday I spoke about my simple life formula where Showing Up was step one. That is not an original thought. I believe it was Woody Allen who said, "80% of success is showing up." I recently scanned a book written by Bill Gates' father called Showing Up For Life. It is a good, quick, simple, downhome read.

At the end he quotes a letter from a friend who was dying that is worth repeating here.

Life is the ultimate teacher, but it is usually
through experience and not scientific research
that we discover its deeper lessons. We are all
here for a single purpose: to grow in wisdom and
learn to love. We can do this through losing as
well as through winning,by having and by not having,
by succeeding or by failing. All we need to do is
to show up openhearted for class...So fulfilling
life's purpose may depend more on how we play than
what we are dealt. You have to be present to win.


Bye For Now,

Bill

williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

THE IMPORTANCE OF ARRIVING

We who have arrived in this world are among the blessed.When you think about it the odds of any of us actually being born are lotto like--actually power ball lotto like. Though we may have some hard times when we wish we were never born,the reality is we were all given the gift of experiencing personhood and the joys and sorrows of living.

Being born is really an opportunity to be and to grow--to give and to receive.

It is important that we use our opportunities wisely and protect ourselves from imploding. Learning lessons from our life experiences and not falling into addictive traps of one form or another are critically important.

We arrive and if we live long enough leave in a helpless and weakened state of mind and body. What we do with our time in between is what counts.

I hope, despite these difficult times, you can rise to the challenge by loving, achieving, enjoying and finding peace of mind. Best as I can tell those are the important signposts on our journey.

Bye For Now,

Bill

williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Monday, September 14, 2009

A SIMPLE FORMULA

WELCOME TO MY BLOG--NOW CALLED MINDLY MATTERS,FORMALLY KNOWN AS COPE WITH THE ECONOMY.COM.

I was recently talking to a young person whose engine seemed to be stuck in neutral.

I said, success in life is not complicated,but it demands effort and discipline. Whether it be school, work, a significant relationship, playing a sport or taking up a hobby it demands:


SHOWING UP
TAKING ACTION
TRYING YOUR VERY BEST

I guarantee that this formula will work for you and think that it probably has many times in your life. So if your tank is empty and your motor not moving you forward, try these steps and you will be on your way again.


Bye For Now,

Bill

williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Test

this is a test

Friday, September 11, 2009

IT'S THE ECONOMY..STUPID!

This famous rallying cry by Bill Clinton is still relevant. Even though I am switching to mindlymatters.com I still reserve the right to speak of issues financial.

As you may recall I started this blog searching for realistic optomism in our efforts to cope with the economy.

Let me be clear. Reality suggests we are a long way from being over with what came as close to a '29 depression as we have seen. Optomism suggests there is a spike in people's confidence based on some indicators, including the stock market and the governments support of significant institutions.

We aren't as paniced as we were. Many are reporting improved sales though quite a few are still struggling. Confidence and optomism are positive and need to continue.

Let us not forget those unemployed, those who have had to walk away from homes, those who have no medical insurance and who can't afford their prescriptions,let alone doctor copays. Too many people are struggling badly for us to assume all is well and the worst is over. The stock market may look forward (and sometimes is wrong), but we must look at the reality of the now and be careful not to repeat the mistakes we have made. Cautious, conservative optomism still seems the best strategy. The celebrations may be a ways off. Let us never forget those who have or are suffering. Especially today!


Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

changing to mindlymatters.com on 9/14

Thursday, September 10, 2009

THIS IS ABOUT LIFE, NOT THE BEATLES!

There was a program on TV tonight about the Beatles.

What struck me beyond their music was their success. They began as youngsters with a dream. They ended up becoming everyone's dream.

Their iconic status can be an inspiration for us all. Clearly, they were talented,maybe even creative geniuses in the music field. But it all came together for them at the right time in the right way. I remember seeing them for the first time on the Ed Sullivan Show. They were instantly loveable and Paul was,admittedly adorable--probably still seen that way among the older set.

The really cool thing about life is that tomorrow or next month or year may be your "Beatles" bustout. Don't stop. NEVER GIVE UP! Keep on truckin. We never know who's turn is next. So many of their hits fit right here. You fill in the blank__________. How about, "Get Back to Where You Once Belonged?" I chose it because it is playing right now. It applies to many who have sufferred serious hardship as a result of the economy.

Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

becoming Mindly Matters.com on 9/14/09

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

WHERE IS....?

Almost all parents sang "where is thumbkin?" to their kids on a regular basis.

Clearly, given the popularity of texting, we were unwittingly giving them directions for a whole new world order. Who knew? Thumb away kiddies! Thumbs up!

Bye For Now

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

changing to mindlymatters.com next Monday

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

MINDLY MATTERS

The prettiest part of our beautiful mind is its ability to change course midstream.

So after being bombarded by emails that basically say, "WTF does your blog have to do with coping with economic issues,I am am finally changing. Despite explaining myself more than once, I give! UNCLE!

As of next Monday, the name of my blog will be the name of a column I wrote years ago for a local newspapaer--MINDLY MATTERS.

You can still reach here via copewiththeeconomy.com but the new title is more relevant. Thanks to those of you who kept pushing me in this direction.

Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com
954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Friday, September 4, 2009

ANGER MANAGEMENT:PART II

Many years ago I was trying to help a man with his anger issues. They revolved mostly around his road rage. All of our talk and my rational appeals seemed to fall on hard of hearing ears. Actually, he heard me loud and clear,but his behavior remained unchanged. He would do the usual stuff--chase after those who cut him off, curse and scream at offending drivers and even a few "put up your dukes" scenes. You don't want to know what he said about older drivers. Good I was young then.

Sometimes life offers built in cures aka serendipity. One day he was at the airport waiting for a parking spot,signal blinking. The car pulled out and a pick up truck pulled around the corner and right into the spot totally ignoring my guy. He jumped out of his car with red faced rage, righteous indignation and explicatives flying.

The guy in the pick up calmly pointed a 357 Magnum in my guy's face and said, "Do you really want to have this fight? "No sir," my guy politely said as he backed away and drove off as fast as possible. He was cured on the spot. He came in and told me the story and never returned to road rage or my office. I would like to think that our talks seeded his awakening as the gun certainly validated my appeals.

The moral of the story is as I said yesterday, "So better not to know them and just pass on by."

Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Thursday, September 3, 2009

ANGER MANAGMENT: PART I

Someone recently told me that someone told him about these simple words when feeling enraged by bad drivers, rude people, those who are selfish,inconsiderate and greedy:


IF THEY KNEW BETTER...
THEY WOULD DO BETTER!

I have added: SO BETTER NOT TO KNOW THEM
AND JUST PASS ON BY.

Sometimes the simplest thoughts can be the most powerful.

Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A MEATY MATTER!

In 1982 I went to West Africa for a ten day adventure studying alternative medicine,healers,herbalists and the like. It was quite amazing in all respects. When I returned I had completely lost my taste for meat. Prior to the trip I ate all forms regularly. As soon as it ended the thought of a steak, hamburger,veal chop or lamb was enough to make me lose my appetite. I was like a pregnant woman. I have been like that ever since.

I never knew why it happened. This was not animal country and I am not an animal activist, nor a vegan. I didn't have a bad experience on the trip with meat,though we ate mostly fish as we were on the coast. I simply assumed a voodoo priest did it to save my heart.

Paradoxically, I could, on rare occasion, have a piece of bacon, salami or hot dog,but generally speaking I would only eat fish or chicken. Until yesterday. Last week out in California I had lunch with the man who led the African trip. For reasons unknown, later that day I had the thought that not eating meat was just a state of mind over meaty matter. Ever the student of behavioral change I tucked the idea away for future consideration.

Last night my wife ordered a Char Hut burger, while I ordered a grilled tuna salad. However, when my wife walked away from the table I was seized by a compulsive feeling and immediately took a bite of her burger. When she returned to the table she kiddingly inquired as to whether I took any of her fries. I said, "No, but I had a bite of your burger." She said, "No you didn't." I said, "Yes I did" and proceeded to take another bite and then told her about my thoughts in California.

I cant say that I loved it and am jonesing for another, but I didn't get sick or nauseated either. Actually, it tasted alot like chicken!

Maybe, I'm not pregnant anymore? Maybe,the voodoo priest who put the "hold the meat" spell, took it off for good behavior over 27 years? Or maybe,just maybe, it was all in my mind to begin with. Who said you can't teach an old dog new tricks? Ruff Ruff--keep your mind open to change. It can happen anytime, even after years of doing something a certain way. Just ask any person who used to smoke,drug,gamble,etc. They will be quick to say, you can change your ways if you want to or if forces just combine to make that happen as was the case in my case. That is why I always say, NEVER,NEVER NEVER GIVE UP!!!

Maybe,next she orders a steak I will give it a try. Becha it tastes alot like chicken--everything does you know!

Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

RISKY BUSINESS!

Clearly, I have been put on the,"Desperate for Cash" list. Last week, and I kid you not, I received nine emails wanting to share millions of dollars with me. Yusef Ahmed wants to give me 40% of 10.5 million--a transaction which is "100% risky free".

Mr Phil Herald credited my email address with $891,934.00 and Michael Smith told me in confidence that I have 1,000,000.00 GBP from the MONDAY GROUP. I must, "confirm this receipt by replying the due process unit officer."

Now folks, the first thing I want to say is that if you want to scam me you really need to know English.As soon as I see those misspellings and gramatical goulosh I am onto you like butter on bread. All the Bank of America look alike emails that say there is a problem with your account so provide us with the following info so we can fix it are easy to spot because of their mistakes. Also, if you want me to bite on a million,you need to tell me whether GBP is a Great Britain Pound or a Grab Bag of Piss! Also guys, no more "risky free" nonsense. If I am going to get a bundle of money I need to know that the risk is there or else how can I believe you're really going to pony up. Finally, you need to provide a reason you want to share this huge sum with me. I might just bite if you told me that "I want to share this with you and you alone Dr. Penzer, as a reward for your brilliance ( but you gotta spell it correctly!). "Handsome and brilliant" and I'm all in baby!

On a more serious note beware of scammers. As the internet becomes more advanced they will multiply and become even more creative. The scarry thing is that obviously people do get sucked into these seemingly ridiculous offers, for if they didn't I wouldn't be receiving so many emails all dealing with the same thing.

By the way, please take me off the "Desperate for Cash" list. It is true that my practice is a little bit slow this summer, but as my grandma would say, "I am fortunate. I have what to eat!"


Bye For Now,

Bill

www.williampenzerphd.com

954 475 1371 x 1
561 361 1898 x 1

check 3/17 blog to know our goals